As a show that straddles both American and British culture, Ted Lasso has the difficult job of appealing to two very distinct national tastes. Though Season 3 performed exceptionally well among American television audiences, who lauded “da soccer ball part,” British audiences were less enthused. British television critics, in particular, felt that Lasso’s tribulations were trivial, and that the character should face more legitimate struggles.
“Oi, throw somethin’ at tha bloody wanka that sends ‘im for a loop, innit?” wrote one esteemed critic for The Guardian. To appease British fans, creators chose to take this season in a more dismal direction for the beloved football coach.
Episode 1 of Season 4 starts with a bang: literally. As Lasso wakes up with a beaming smile on his face and attempts to shut off his alarm clock in the opening scene, the device instantaneously explodes, blowing off three of the fingers on Lasso’s left hand. This is no trouble to the indomitable Lasso, who good-naturedly remarks “Good thing I still got my trusty thumb!” and gives the audience a grotesquely contorted thumbs up. His thumb then falls off.
Lasso proceeds to get ready for the day by donning his trusty outfit: khakis, a white button down, a blue sweater, and a whistle. Unfortunately for Lasso, moths have made massive holes in the crotches of every pair of his pants and underwear, exposing his penis, which is slightly smaller than average. To make himself feel better, he blows his ol’ reliable whistle, which, off-screen, was infected with HIV.
Unfazed by his new diagnosis, Lasso revs up his car and embarks on his usual drive to the pitch. At the first intersection, he hits a small bump, and his car flips five times, lights on fire, extinguishes, straightens up for a moment, then flips again and
incinerates.
This, viewers think, must be the end of our hero. But, like a folksy Midwestern phoenix, Lasso falls out of the ashes, limbless yet still breathing. He manages to cough out his iconic quote – “Be curious, not judgemental” – which is entirely irrelevant to his harrowing circumstances but charming as all hell.
Lasso begins a painstaking roll to the facility that takes up much of the episode, but it’s not all rolling and grunting: about 25 minutes in, Lasso receives a call from the hospital. The doctor there informs Lasso that his son, Henry, was killed in an ecoterroism attack. His last words were “I am not proud of, nor do I love my father.”
Unfazed, Lasso continues his roll, and finally reunites with the A.F.C. Richmond team. But midway into practice, a pandemic wipes out the entire global population, leaving only Lasso and the team remaining. Undeterred, the coach pulls the boys in for a pep talk.
“It’s just you and me, boys, and that’s all we really need. Like my pop used to say—” his folksy adage is cut short by an asteroid that destroys the training facility, killing everyone inside.
With no friends, no car, and no corporal form, the remainder of Season 4 takes place in Lasso’s mind: a glittering palace of fun sayings, Midwestern optimism, and schizophrenic visions of British people. Yet despite the horrors, Lasso’s spirit reigns supreme, catapulting the series into a highly anticipated Season 5 in which Lasso will be resurrected from the dead.
A Harvard Lampoon parody
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