Woman of the People

While hundreds of stars dazzled our red carpet at this year’s Met Gala, one was notably lacking. Instead of attending the event, Zendaya flew to Guthrie, Missouri, to delight and intrigue the local populace. Guthrie has neither a hotel nor a large enough economy to sustain Airbnbs, so Zendaya was taken in by the Hermanns, a family which lacked cable TV, streaming services, and access to the internet.

Ma Hermann took Zendaya under her wing, thinking the Emmy-winning actress was a stranded hitchhiker. She invited the celeb inside for a glass of lemonade or a nice scoop of Snickers salad, but Zendaya took one look at the jacks set out on the coffee table and made a beeline straight to the Hermanns’ hearts.

“Y’all like jacks?” asked the actress.

“Pa says not to talk to strangers,” replied little Jackie, “unless they want to play a good old American game of jacks.”

For the next five hours, the actress bounced a red ball up and down with the little Hermanns— Jackie, Jack, Jacqueline, Jack-Jack, and Jake—as Ma Hermann and Pa Hermann watched on with joy in their hearts. Zendaya lost herself in the rhythm of the jacks, their unique shape and sound. “How could an object be both pointy and smooth?” she wondered to herself.

Back in New York, celebs fought to be interviewed by Emma Chamberlain, filmed in a Glambot slow-mo, and adored by the masses. Out in Guthrie, Zendaya was fighting only for small metal pieces with six points each. She’d already won the Hermanns’ love.

A Harvard Lampoon parody